Wild Stallion

Italian rugby star Salvatore Perugini has issued a stark warning to New Zealand ahead of the 2007 Rugby World Cup.

After seeing off the Scots on Saturday for their first ever away win in the RBS Six Nations, things have got a little out of control in the corridors of power in Italian rugby. "If we can beat the Scots then our first game in the World Cup this summer against New Zealand should be no problem, we will crush them with our handling majesty," declared Perugini. Despite being rated at odds of between 200 and 1,000-1 by the bookies to win the cup, Perugini is defiant: "We are fighters and we are lovers. This will be the year that the world understands the beautiful painting of Italian rugby. And if we don't win, at least we look good when we walk down the streets of Madrid with the fashion."

isporty wants to know who you think is going to win this year's World Cup. Surely it'll be England. Or probably New Zealand or Australia or South Africa. And did you know that Argentina are rated with a much better chance than Scotland? Crikey, whatever next?

Wild Blue Honda

Those limp-wristed, liberal, do-gooders over at the Honda Formula One HQ are swapping last year's Lucky Strike cigarette advertising for a giant picture of the Earth to raise awareness of environmental issues.

"Climate change is probably the single biggest issue facing the global community and F1 is not immune from it," team boss Nick Fry said in a statement today. The fact that the RA107 vehicle that the logo is splattered all over uses more fuel in one lap than a fleet of Jumbo jets is of absolutely no consequence, whatsoever. And guess what, you can have your own name on the .. in tiny, eco-friendly letters. Check out their fuel-guzzling website, sign up and before you know it, you'll be squinitng till your eyes fall off as you try in vain to locate your name on a car travelling 270 miles per hour. The season starts in Melbourne on March 18.

isporty would like to know what hypocritical, headline grabbing, PR spinning nonsense your sports club has come up with over the years in order to make themselves feel better about stuff.

Golf tricks

The John Virgo of the golfing world shows off his trick shots.

Borat wrestling Harry Smith

Watch this funny sketch of Borat trying out his new wrestling skills!

Bermuda Snorts

More aggro in the build up to the Cricket World Cup as Bermudan cricket officials react angrily to suggestions by the Dutch team that they have exclusive rights over thrashing Scotland.

Bermudan wicket-dodger Kevin Hurdle said: "If anyone's going to slaughter the Scots, we will. The very idea that any Dutch team is going to get in there first and bag three points is laughable." Commentators then informed Hurdle that Bermuda weren't actually in Scotland's group, to which Hurdle retorted: "Just because we're making up the numbers as part of a futile attempt by the cricket authorities to make out the whole world loves cricket, doesn't mean we can't beat Scotland. Of course we can. We wouldn't turn up at all if we didn't think there was a good chance of us playing an even worse team than ourselves." There are nearly 2,000 cricketers in Bermuda.

isporty wants to know how excited you are about the prospect of Holland versus Scotland in the cricket World Cup in March. Will it be painful to watch or are you actually intending to crack open the beers, unleash the pretzels and have a cracking good laugh at their expense?

Man United secrets exposed

Man Utd No.2 loses his mind and tells the world Fergie's secrets.

So now we know the secrets to Manchester Utd's success. In a somewhat misguided interview in this week's Zoo magazine, Man Utd No 2 Carlos Queiroz decided to blow the gaff on exactly what makes the team tick. Apparently it's all down to six bits of paper stuck on the dressing room wall. The 'most important words' are king at Old Trafford, ranging from the 'six most important words' down to the 'single most important word. So here they are then, the six crucial messages every Manchester United player has to learn before he goes out on the pitch.

The six most important words: 'Don't Let Neville Take Free Kick'

The five most important words: 'Always Give Ball To Ponyboy'

The four most important words: 'Never take drug test''

The three most important words: 'I hate Liverpool'

The two most important words: 'And Chelsea'

The one most important word: 'Money'

So there yo have it, the key to success. All you have to do now is write them down and put them on your own dressing room wall and watch the results roll in.

isporty would like to know your own motivational secrets. What's the best team talk you've ever received? Was it a simple: "Get stuck in, you lilly-livered nancy boys!", or was there a certain nuance to the oratory that beguiled, informed and inspired? Let us know because we haven't got a clue